I was raised as a Christian and as such I thought I knew the Bible pretty well and had a good understanding of right and wrong. I thought I knew what I needed to do “get” my spot in heaven and what others should and shouldn’t do. It took me many hard lessons and years to learn that all I really knew was right and wrong from a religious viewpoint.
Growing up, I was convinced God must be disappointed in me since I always failed to live the perfect life. I had been taught that if you were in the right denomination that would assure you of your salvation; if you could live up to what they interpreted the Bible to say about living “right.”
For me the problem was that the “right” denomination didn’t give me any more power to overcome evil than the head knowledge I received from and by being religious. Being religious was only a façade that covered my true identity in Christ.
Communication was a big issue for us; I didn’t know how to communicate with Marilyn in a way to build her up and not trigger her into anger. So in fear, I would usually stay quiet and not “rock the boat”, hoping somehow “things” would just be okay.
We experienced a number of ministries, including Cleansing Stream, Neil Andersons’ Seven Steps to Freedom, Breakthrough and many, many prayer sessions.
In 1997 we were introduced to Restoring The Foundations (RTF) ministry, which has made a huge impact on my life and our marriage. Through RTF I was able to break off the pornography of my past, the perfectionism, the religiosity and all of my ancestral sins.
Through RTF I’ve learned how to live life and live in God’s grace. I’ve Learned to communicate with less fear has been critical in our relationship. I now have grace for other people and know that God has a call on my life… and I am actually walking in it.